Two things in the physical that I have learned from dieting/fasting:

1. I CRAVE those stupid little goldfish crackers EVERY time!

Honestly, I get full on jealous of my kids. Picture gollum glaring angrily and covetously at the children whilst absently whispering "my precious" to the fish... Yeah, it's that bad. ;)

2. Don't continue to take the cayenne pepper gel caps.

Why would one take them in the first place you ask? Well, it's "supposed" to increase metabolism, which in my case is not a bad thing. ;) Never mind that I already put it in almost everything I cook... haha At any rate here's what happened:

So I'm living on veggies and fruit. I have horrid acid reflux any day of the week, for some reason when I'm drinking a LOT of water, and eating just fruit and veggies it becomes even more spectacular. Instead of a lazy thick lava flow meandering up and down my throat as usual, picture a massive fountain of record-hot lava spewing straight up into the air and you get the idea. So what do I do? Continue my vitamin consumption as normal.

By now my heartburn is in full gear and I've just had salad with hot peppers and a bottle of water. It is at this moment that I decide, for some reason, perhaps mental impairment due to the new herbivore diet, to take my vitamins. So a bottle of water and a hand full of vitamins later I feel a suspicious feeling in my esophagus that makes me think one of the vitamins may have scratched my throat on the way down. (If you have ever taken "horse pills" you may know the feeling I'm talking about.) Over the next few minutes the sensation becomes increasingly intense.

I am now fairly certain that the peppers were a bad idea as it must be the heartburn ramping up. However, it remains in one exact spot and intensifies to the point that I become concerned there is a hole now being burnt into my esophagus. So, I rush into the store frantically seeking relief from my friend/enemy (a story for another day) TUMS!!! All I can think at this point is "MUST.HAVE.TUMS!" My vision is starting to become blurry from the tears welling up in my eyes so I grab my bottle of water from my purse and chug it, knowing it will increase the "flow" of lava but it will at least temper it long enough for me to get the magical medicine that will swiftly put an end to my misery. To my surprise the 1/2 bottle of water suddenly relieved the pain.

It is in that moment I realize that the god-forsaken cayenne gelcap had gone down horizontally and lodged itself. As the gel dissolved the cayenne did it's best to kill me.

Needless to say, it made the reflux twice as bad the rest of the day.

Moral of the story: Don't take the gelcaps. If you do...drink a TON of extra water afterward....just to be sure. ;)

Two Chicks Walk Into a Walmart....

Question of the day: Again, this is NOT a judgmental question. It is one I often ponder. There is no condemnation, I'm just curious.) With all the fighting for marriage equality, the right for everyone to experience the "joy" of marriage....

Why do people *really* want to get married???

Marriage is a vow, a commitment before man and God that we **swear**, as in: oath, to uphold, even, no ESPECIALLY, through the worst, until death.

Yet divorce rates are through the roof. If we marry for "loooooveeeee" and love is unconditional, and we swear that we will stay, even when we don't want to, and that we put the needs of the other before our own, and we vow to do this until we die, why do so many marriages end? Is it because we don't really marry for love, is the love not unconditional as the vows suggest, or do we not really marry for life?

We got married because we didn't want to be alone.

Why did you get married?

What do people who marry for life do differently to make their marriage last?

I want to hear from y'all! ^_^

(*Disclaimer* Just because we are still married, does not mean we didn't knock on the door of divorce. It does not mean we did not lose the desire to try. It does not mean we did not have plenty of good reasons (according to society) to leave without blame. So don't think I mean this just to other people, it applies to us as well.)

Hey, If You Have All the Answers, I'd Like to Hear Them!

Okay...First things first: NO, this is NOT sarcastic and it is not baiting for an argument. (So, if anyone feels the need to be hostile, take it elsewhere.) I would just like to know...

To those of my family/friends that do not believe the Bible is the supreme authority on how we humans should live, (or are of the keep your beliefs to your self, other people's choices aren't your business, etc. persuasion); basically, if there is no universal, absolute moral truth:

1. How does one determine what is and is not acceptable behavior? (Where does one draw the line?)

2. What is the basis determining said moral/ethical/legal codes?

3. Who should determine such things and how do we apply them without "forcing said beliefs" on others?

I have never not believed, so I have never had to consider any such answer and this election got me wondering how people with different perspectives would have the nation create laws and enforce them.  

 

I ask this because I have been told and seen countless posts telling me to "keep my morals to myself" but that is in fact exactly what our laws are. Moral code of conduct. So, if the Bible is "out" what is our measuring stick?

Holy Flying Ape Crap, Batman!

It has been over a year since my last post! I am failing in my duty to waste your time and kill your brain cells. >.< I apologize for letting my responsibility slide. Let's see...what useless bit of drivel can I make you regret reading today?... I know! Let's talk about...your mother! I kid, what is there to say that hasn't already been said about her, eh? 

Moving on. I was out with the kids the other day and I saw some jackwagon with a poorly written sign. It wasn't your average protest sign pissing and whining about some self-centered tool's supposed "rights". It was a news of the century story! Apparently there is a murderous band of guns that have run amok killing people! I have to admit I was completely taken  aback. Why had I not heard about this? I mean ALL news simply must go through me!.. How could something as scientifically astounding as autonomous weaponry gone mad slip by without my having heard of it before now? Never mind the potential threat it may pose to my family!

So many questions flooded my mind... How on earth did they come into existence? Did they evolve? Did their molecules decide one day that some grudge against the organic life forms, called "humans", must be settled with bloodshed and thus began their spontaneous evolution from inanimate to living, breathing, thinking entities?! Can they mutate other guns with a touch, like the entity in the Dr. Who ep. “The Empty Child”; is it a viral change? Or...are they an alien life form from some other mysterious world? I don't know...the only-partially-informative-sign did not tell the whole story. This would require research and defensive preparations….

The first thing I did when I got home was make sure my guns were separated from their ammo, though the “news sign” did not specify that the guns had used bullets to kill their targets, I felt this was a prudent preventative measure. Next, I made sure they were all properly gagged, “locked” as we had called it before this new development, though I am not certain that they communicate via speech, they could be evolved enough to communicate with thought alone. This thought in turn brought up the question do they even have mouths? I don’t know, but the “lock” is securely in place, threaded in through the ejection port and out the magazine well. Which parts of a living gun’s anatomy that would be are unknown to me. (That too would require research and I wondered if any in-depth studies had been conducted on this newly discovered species yet.) I then “bound” my gagged potential terrorists in separate lock boxes to ensure that they could not assist each other in an escape effort.

Upon completing my preventative defense preparations I grabbed some caffeine and sat down at my laptop to begin research and as I did I wondered briefly if it too may evolve one day and joined by others of it’s kind go on a mad killing spree…but I had no time to consider the endless list of possible species development at the time, I had to learn more about this formidable new threat!

What I learned was indeed alarming! Not only are these “killer guns” not autonomous, intelligent or murderous in nature, there is not even one single documented case of a “living” gun. This news-reporting buffoon on the street corner was not only misinformed but apparently lacked the intellect to even verify that this murderous-band-of-firearms tale bore any semblance of truth! I have heard of exaggeration, but to twist fact into such absurd fiction and then claim it as truth is a clear indication of the extreme lack of good-judgment and integrity.

This news prompted me to post a "funny" photo on facebook in which a protester, of the whining variety, is holding a sign that reads "Gun sellers are accomplices of crimes”, to illustrate the point of my findings. A gun seller is no more an accomplice, (to be an accomplice requires knowledge of the intended crime so that one might encourage or help the perpetrator actually commit the crime), than a gun is a murderer. (To be a murderer one must have “malice aforethought” or “intent” to kill (murder) “another human being”, therefore as the gun is not a “human being” and (as far as is known) has no ability to think, thus no “aforethought” it cannot be a murderer, or killer: the oft used synonym.)

There are two lessons from this: 1. Truth should be a mandate of news reporting, but it is not. 2. Therefore, always research what you read/hear/see reported, NEVER blindly take the information at face value. You have a brain, use it. (See that, not one, but TWO lessons! This was not a complete waste of time after all… For that I apologize.)

Until next time monkeys…

Serious Again: We are NOT called to be timid!

Lately I find myself wanting to scream at the top of my lungs something that is weighing so heavily on my heart of late.

Everyone talks about what we are called to do and not do in Christ, and in recent years the message has become condensed into that of Love, Forgiveness and Acceptance, but brothers and sisters I am here to tell you, that is not the whole story!!! For our God IS a jealous God (Ex 20:5, 2 Cor 11:2), and a God of Wrath (Rom 1:18, Rev 16:19)! YES He absolutely loves us, and if we seek forgiveness with REPENTANT hearts, it is ours. BUT if we choose sin over OBEDIENCE, silence over BOLDNESS, and deceit over TRUTH, then we are NOT following the call the that Christ issued!

Yes, we are commanded not to judge a person's heart, as only the Father in Heaven knows the secrets of man's heart, BUT we ARE called to judge actions, practices, and doctrines so that we will not be led astray and given to deceit (2 Cor 4:2, Eph 5:6, 2 Tim 3:13). In order to determine what is right and wrong, we must be in scripture. We were given the word of God as a guide to our thoughts, behaviors, and actions and as a measurement for separating truth from lies (Ps 119:105, 1 Pet 1:23, Heb 4:12). We have been warned to guard against deceit, against that which leads His children astray, and against sinful behaviors. (Jude 3-22, Acts 20:24, Acts 20:28-30) If we do not speak the truth against such things then by our actions (silence) we are CONDONING those things which are not in keeping with the word of God, and for every person we either purposefully or by omission lead astray, and every stumbling block we lay or allow to remain unhindered in the path of another, shall have to answer for to our Father in Heaven on the day of our Judgement.

Jesus did not preach quietly or in fear of His safety, social status, or loss of riches. He spoke boldly and with confidence! It is through the Holy Spirit, with the example of Christ and armed with the word of God that we are to also boldly bring the truth to the world, and help our brothers and sisters in Christ in our walk and aid each other should we stumble. "And He Himself game some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ; that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting, but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all thing into Him who is the head -- Christ-- from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love." - Eph 4:11-16 Every day we are to put on the armor of God to protect us, equip us for spiritual battle, and to guide us in His wisdom and will. (Eph 6:10-18)

Our purpose in Christ is not to seek popularity or esteem in the world, but to share the truth; not to cling to this life forsaking the commands of our Father, but to submit to His will with confidence, peace and joy in our hearts through faith in Him!

Be gone you blue screen spawn of Satan!

Blue screens are the devil.

Not to rip off Waterboy...but they are. 

 If you have ever encountered one then you already know this. If you have not...be on your guard, the blue screen is lurking behind your seemingly innocent monitor just waiting for its chance to attack. 

You will be sitting there, minding your own business when BAM out of nowhere this horrid evil beast jumps out at you, not dissimilar to the demon in that possessed maze game that was taking over the internet several years ago. (You know the one I’m talking about. No doubt one of your “friends” sent you a link to this “fun game”, accompanied by some form of bragging about how far they got in it, in which you are supposed to navigate an increasingly narrower maze as quickly as possible without touching the edge, for if you do you are sent back to the beginning to start over. So after a misstep or two you are now concentrating intensely on not making a mistake again when suddenly a horrid demon jumps out at you screeching in some ungodly tone, causing you to lose your composure completely and revert to some primal state that can only be described as a combination of sheer terror and complete confusion resulting in girlish screams and possible loss of control of your bodily functions. For many of you these same “friends” took much pleasure in planning this attack and even went to great lengths to make a video record of this most humiliating moment to share with the world via “youtube”, a site that was seemingly created for the purpose of exploiting the humiliation of such unsuspecting victims. )

But I digress; this story is about the evil blue screen. So it goes something like this: One minute you are doing your work or peacefully browsing the internet and the next thing you know you are staring evil in the eye. Not only does this thing invade your personal space without warning or invitation, but it then proceeds to sabotage you. In some language you don’t comprehend it taunts you, and then your screen goes blank. Your screams of terror can be heard from outer space. It begins as shock, eases its way into panic, then grief as the realization that whatever you were working on is lost, with rage rounding the corner not far behind. To complicate matters further it hides behind numerous “possible causes” so as to steal your time as greedily as a sugar fiend guzzles sweets. If you know a bit about the machine you were operating you will probably invest a fair amount of additional time in researching and through much trial and error attempt to restore order and some sense of reassurance that you will not experience such horror again. If you do not know anything about how the machine works and are just using it in much the way the majority of “licensed” people operate cars, (minimal knowledge required), then you will likely end up calling a “geek” to come to your rescue. This option could result in a “nominal” financial investment, which this blue screen devil no doubt revels in. The ultimate joy for this beast is the loss of function of the machine resulting in the loss of your horde of data, usually in the form of documents, photos and music, that you no doubt hold dear.

Why am I telling you all this? Mostly for the perverse pleasure of knowing that you will now be worried about when and where this thing will sneak up on you, possibly losing sleep over it…You know the saying… Misery loves company. 

I’m just sayin’, watch your back, or monitor…either way.

"Open Mindedness" = Hypocrisy

I detest hypocrisy. I believe it is the height of ignorance.

You'll have to forgive me humor is set aside this time...but I promise it will be back. ^_^

When people say to me that I am "close minded" or "judgmental" for simply stating what I believe to be truth according to the Word of God, is that not in itself a judgmental and close minded statement? It's hypocrisy. If you decided that a person is close minded for not sharing your beliefs, are you not doing the exact thing you described? You are being close minded to my way of thinking, are you not? 

EVERYONE is close minded to some degree. If you say there is nothing wrong with abortion but there is something wrong with opposing it you are doing the exact same thing the group of people you are opposed to are doing. 

Is legally forcing people to not pray in school any different than legally forcing them to pray?  Nope.

For example, let's say an Atheist says they are offended by hearing me pray and takes me to court to prevent me from praying anywhere they could possibly hear it. In turn, I am offended by their complaint, should I then take them to court over it and try to legally prevent them from disagreeing? My praying and their overhearing is not forcing them to do anything...they are free to walk away. HOWEVER their seeking to have it legally mandated that I cannot pray DOES force me to do something. How is that equality? How is that balanced? It is not, it is equally as "close minded". It is wholly hypocritical.

Being "Open Minded" means that you have to accept "Close Mindedness" lest you be considered "Close Minded" about "Close Mindedness". Funny isn't it.

If people were to be completely 100% open minded there would be no penalty for ANY action. NOTHING would be a crime because nothing would be wrong it would just be "different" or "diverse". By making anything a crime you are being close minded to the ideas of the perpetrator. Making you...yup that's right...a hypocrite. If you are to say my beliefs are close minded then you must then admit that by definition yours are also. You cannot preach open mindedness and yet not accept every action or thought of any other person. And that my friend would result in total chaos. Which is a topic for another time. lol

How is my saying that "If you do not believe that Jesus is the son of God and accept Him as your Lord and Savior then you will not go to Heaven." any worse than anyone else saying "If you believe that then you are a bigot and a horrible person and you shouldn't be allowed to say that!"? The fact is, it isn't.

What is acceptable has become simply a matter of whose voice is louder. If that's how it's gonna be then I am gonna SCREAM IT FROM THE ROOF TOPS FOR ALL THE WORLD TO HEAR! BECAUSE I AM NOT AFRAID OR ASHAMED OF MY SAVIOR AND HIS TEACHINGS AND NOTHING ANYONE SAYS OR DOES WILL EVER CHANGE THAT!!! And all the hypocrisy lovers out there can put that in their pipe and smoke it!